From Kentucky to the TARDIS
by Annienygma
Summary: On her 30th birthday, Ana Reese stumbles upon a blue box in search of a porta-potty and gets much more than she bargained for. Features Nine and OC at present. Takes place either before "Rose" or when the Doctor disappears/reappears to give Rose a second chance to travel with him. No idea where this is going yet. I own nothing except for my OCs.
1. Chapter 1: ISO a Porta-Potty

It all started on my 30th birthday. Being such a big occasion I had walked to the local bar to get drunk and dance until they closed at midnight. Some guys had offered to drive me home but since I knew what they wanted (and I definitely wasn't interested), I refused and set out for home, walking as straight as my legs could manage.

The streets in my small Kentucky town were deserted. Not a single cop drove by on patrol as I kept to the alleyways to avoid a PI (public intoxication) charge. I should have used the bathroom before I left the bar but I remembered that the library had a porta-potty stationed outside due to their renovations. Hoping that it was unlocked, I made a detour to check. To my delight, they had two nice blue porta-potties stationed right outside. The second one said "Police Box" on the top but at this point I really had to pee so when the first one had a padlock on it I tried the door regardless.

It opened, so I darted inside and closed the door. The box immediately started shaking, making this god-awful sound. I fell to the floor in the blackness, grabbing round for something to hold on to when the shaking suddenly stopped and all was silent again.

That was when the lights popped on.

I discovered that I was sitting on the floor of this gigantic room. Near me were some metal steps that led up to this pulsing…_thing_ that had switches and dials and tons of steam punky stuff surrounding it. All around the room were these curved supports that looked oddly like coral, stretching up to the ceiling.

It took a moment for everything to register but when it did I jumped up, grabbed the door, and threw myself outside so hard I landed on the ground blinking in the sunshine.

Sunshine?


	2. Chapter 2: The Hanging Man

_What the hell? _At first all I could do was sit there and gawk up at that crazy blue box. In the daylight I could tell that it was definitely _not_ a porta-potty. I stood up and stumbled around it, scratching my head as I tried to make my brain start functioning again. I completely forgot about needing to pee and focused on trying to sober up so that I could make sense of what was happening.

"Oi!"

A man's voice echoed in the air. I looked around, using my hand to shield my eyes from the bright sunlight and realized that I must be more drunk than I thought because it looked like there were _two_ suns up in the sky.

It dawned on me that I was in some sort of desert area. A wide canyon started a few feet away from where I stood and an old rope bridge spanned the gap. On the other side, huge birds were circling some sort of wooden tower. I squinted hard and realized that there was a man spread-eagled near the top of it.

"_Oi!_ A little help here!" the man called out again. I rubbed my eyes, disbelieving, as one of the birds dived at the man and I heard him cry out in pain.

I made for the bridge and climbed the ramp that lead to the wooden planks spanning the canyon. A breeze caused the bridge to sway and I stopped dead because my stomach started swaying with it.

"Hurry up!" The man shouted. I looked up to see the birds were getting braver so I swallowed hard and started walking across, determined not to look down.

About halfway across the bridge one of the boards snapped. I screamed as I fell and grabbed at the ropes to catch myself. My arms screamed in protest as I pulled myself to safety. Panting in shock, I lay there on the bridge, the man temporarily forgotten. _What the hell was I doing?_

"Are you hurt?" the man called out. I groaned. My arms felt like they were on fire, but the pain helped me to focus and I felt my head begin to clear. I looked up from where I was laying and saw one of the birds begin to fly a lazy circle above my head.

_They would come after me if I didn't get moving_, I realized. Gritting my teeth, I climbed back to my feet and carefully worked my way across the rest of the bridge, testing every board before putting my full weight on it.

I made it to the tower without further trouble and looked up at the man hanging from it. My back and arms were throbbing but I tried to ignore the pain as I climbed the ladder up to where he was hanging.

"Bloody hell, you're completely pissed!" he said me as I began to untie him.

"You'd be pissed too if you walked into a bathroom and ended up in a desert!" I snapped.

He frowned at that. "Where are you from?"

I blinked at him. "Cynthiana, Kentucky. You from England? You sound like you're from England."

He snorted. "A bit North of England, and I meant that you're drunk, not angry, but apparently both apply in your case. Sorry, didn't realize you were American. I'm the Doctor, by the way, and who are you?"

"Ana Reese."

"Hello, Ana Reese," the man responded as I finished freeing one of his arms. About that time one of the birds, sensing the loss of their meal, dived at my head. Instinctively, I threw my arm up to knock it away and my foot slipped with the motion.

The Doctor caught me before I could fall and I hugged the ladder, catching my breath. He continued to work on his bonds while I recovered. "You said something about walking into a bathroom and ending up here?" he asked.

I motioned with my head towards the box on the other side of the canyon. "You see that box over there? It was sitting in a row of porta-potties and it was the only one unlocked. Next thing I know, the thing starts shaking and…."

I paused as the Doctor started laughing. "What's so funny?" I demanded.

"Nothing," he grinned, regaining his composure. "Bit surprised, is all. Would have figured it out eventually, usually do, but I'm glad for the help just the same."

I grunted and went back to work untying his foot.


End file.
